In my Opinion

There's an expression that goes, "opinions are like a**holes, everybody has one". The problem with this expression is that it doesn't cover the complete feeling. Although everyone has an a**hole not everyone is eager to share theirs with you. Your rarely if ever sitting on a bench in the middle of a conversation, just to have someone come over, turn around,drop their pants and spread their cheeks. Thankfully there are laws against that type of behavior. As a matter of fact if you wanted to, you could live most of your life without seeing more than a few handful of a**holes, tops. As long as you stayed away from the internet and late night cable tv.

Opinions on the other hand. These are impossible to stay away from. At every turn people are handing you their opinions, like flyers for a new store or spritzes of a new perfume at the department store. They're handed to you like socks at christmas,completely unwanted. Only these are secondhand or i guess feet socks. Filled with the stench of someone else's journey through life. An opinion is nothing more than a view. Its a personal view, so depending where your window faced growing up, your bound to feel one way or another about certain things. This normally leads to disputes over whose opinion is right and this is why I wished more people kept their opinions to themselves.

Opinions are personal beliefs and should not be disguised in factual clothing. Just because I believe something doesn't make it true. I happen to believe people will actually enjoy reading my nonsense thats probably not true. I believe I'm a genius but that doesn't make it true. Although I am but your just not smart enough to understand. I wouldn't mind opinions so much if after people finished giving you theirs, they would follow it with "of course I could be wrong". For example "the best way to reach a higher mental state is to lick your finger and stick it in an electric socket just as your about to reach orgasm, of course I could be wrong". This way their acknowledging that maybe their just crazy and I don't have to listen to them. People rarely do this however, instead they chose to pass off their views as valid currency when they're really counterfeit bills.

We're living in an age when not only does everyone have an opinion but they have hundreds of venues to display it. No longer does one need a major in broadcast journalism with a minor in english literature to be heard. Now anyone with some free time and a computer can tell you exactly how they're feeling. You can actually follow them minute by minute, because how could you live if you didn't know how your friends new hemorrhoid cream was working or what they're doing at work instead of working.

Outside of all the "social networking" sites there's the blog. Defined by Webster as an online personal journal. Defined by me as a brothel for literary johns. These places are a buffet of opinions and you can find one for every subject imaginable. Invented by someone who felt that handing his opinions to strangers in the streets just wasn't efficient enough. Blogs give mere mortals the power to reach millions with their opinions. Some have even managed to become famous, imagine that. I guess a website gives you just a little more credibility than the regular schmuck on the street.

From now on I too will be handing out my opinions to you. But remember that they are just my views. Just the way I see things. You won't always agree with them but I promise that they will always be open for healthy discussion. So here I am showing you my proverbial a**hole. At least I have a nice a**, of course I could be wrong.